Episode 30: Unity in Marriage (Part 4) - Companionship and Teamwork
Part four of the series on Unity in Marriage explores the joy of companionship and teamwork. Jake and Dr. Bob flesh out what it means to become one of mind and heart, and share personal examples of how they’ve had to tackle self-focus in order to move toward deeper connection through selflessness in their marriages. They also address the question, “How do we honor one another’s strengths and complement in a way that builds teamwork instead of moving in opposite directions?”
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Show Notes
Guiding Quote
“Make my joy complete: be of the same mind, having the same love, being in full accord and of one mind. Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility regard others as better than yourselves. Let each of you look not to your own interests, but to the interests of others.”
- Philippians 2:2-4
Key Points
Marriage is about becoming one of mind and heart. Put the other first to build strong companionship.
Pay attention to your spouse's interests and engage with them there.
Obstacles to companionship are isolation and selfishness.
When we begin to use our emotions to determine the health of our relationship, this can tip us off that we’re likely acting out of selfishness.
Make time to work and to play together.
Identifying complementarity in your relationship and honoring one another’s strengths builds teamwork.
There is real power in a "thank you" for the things your spouse does.
What kills teamwork? Pride or self-focus, laziness, and lack of awareness about what each other brings to the table.
Other obstacles to teamwork are stubbornness and control
When you have a unified vision for what you’re about, it can bring unity to your married life.
Practical Application
Share things that you did for fun as a kid to spark play in the relationship
Spend time with your spouse doing something that primarily interests them. Then, find something that you both enjoy doing together.
Help your spouse with something that is typically their responsibility (ex. yard work, cooking, dishes, laundry, etc.)
Thank your spouse for a moment of ‘daily companionship’ that you appreciate, such as sharing a meal together or sitting on the couch next to each other.
Share some appreciation with your spouse for the strengths you see them bring to the relationship
Resources
Be Devoted, Dr. Bob Schuchts (book)
The Five Dysfunctions of a Team, Patrick Lencioni (book)
